I have just had a very uncomfortable experience with a very angry person. Ugh. Is it just me, or is it extremely unnerving to attempt to soothe a savage beast?
Keeping my calm in the face of anger is my forte. As I may have mentioned, I grew up in a loving, but emotionally, and sometimes physically, volatile home. At age five I knew to keep my mouth shut and listen, or it would just be worse. I am completely capable of listening and remaining objective...if it's not personal.
This was personal. I managed to keep cool, but it was so hard. SO. HARD.
Even when I disagree with someone I can always see at least part of their argument. See and understand. Biting my tongue is easy. Loving in spite of disagreement is easy. Being called a HYPOCRITE because I can see and understand where someone is coming from, but still not agree?! Not so easy.
The conversation ended like this:
ME: You know I love you and I understand where you're coming from. We might just have to agree to disagree here.
THEM: Well...*huff* I love you too(undertone of I want to strip you of your ability to think for yourself and make you my mini me).
I'd call that a success, were it not for the heavy heart I now carry. I hate when I can't soothe someone by just listening...when they aren't satisfied until you give up your belief and adopt theirs. Not. Going. To. Happen.
Deep healing breaths.
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Agreeing to disagree. The story of my life. I'm glad you were able to keep your cool. Good for you!
ReplyDeleteI know the feeling...trust me...but then again, you know that.
ReplyDeleteNext year, you should come with us for the new tradition - we may have to do it a day late or something
quarter-life lady: It's a battle isn't it? Thanks. I just wish I felt like I'd accomplished something.
ReplyDeleteAri- I think you know all too well, love. And I am SO THERE next year. ^__^
That's the worst. I hate it when people can't listen back or accept that people have different beliefs.
ReplyDeleteI hear you on this. Many similar sounding problems to that in my life.
ReplyDeleteJust be glad you handled it well and didn't say anything you'd regret. We've all done that before and it's just no good.
ReplyDeleteMeg- It's almost maddening. Two way street people!
ReplyDeleteStephanie- May the force be with you. It's unbelievably frustrating.
Apollo- That's true. I've been there, and that felt MUCH worse. Thanks!
I hate that feeling...frustration and hurt.
ReplyDelete