Haints

My first impression of this city was of a couple really kind people.

The dude sitting next to me on the plane. He and his husband live here in SF. He was friendly and full of information. Just an all around wonderful guy.

So, I was ready to love it here. To the point of preparing myself to fall head over heals, and beg my husband to move to this glorious city by the Pacific.

Yet, it seems heartless to me now. Dead. It's the first place to ever make me feel truly disconnected.

I've crossed paths with a few people who search for a pair of eyes to connect with. A passing nod. A quick smile, easily wiped away. Harmless.

So, I know there's a pulse. I felt it. It just flat lined.

Is everyone just sporting their I'm a robot mask, or what?

Don't they die a little each time they pass someone without even so much as a glance? No acknowledgment at all. That uncomfortable "don't look at/talk to me" facade. Ick.

I understand why we do it, but doesn't it hurt? Just a little?

Everywhere I look I see shadows of people walking the streets. Streets lined with the disregarded insane, and the people who went hallow in order to keep their hearts from breaking.

What can you do?

Are other big cities like this? Am I just a country bumpkin, or does it seem like this to everyone?

On the brighter side. Nature always saves me. We went to Golden Gate Park yesterday and it was gourgeous. We took the scenic drive. The bridge was beautiful in the fog.

I am so going to Pier 39 to see some sea lions.