How Can Anyone Walk on Water, If They Won't Get Their Butt Out the Boat?

Anybody out there? It's been a long time since I was in a sharing mood, and I feel as if I should apologize for that. I allowed blogging to become just another place that I couldn't speak my mind. I'm not proud of that, and am in the process of changing it.

I've worked for the same nonprofit for over five years, and I've been unhappy with my working situation for around two of those.

If any of my faithful few are still out there, you may recall me blogging about landing a better paying job, giving my notice and leaving in 2009. You might also remember me spending one day on the new job, before crawling back to what I knew. What you won't remember are all of the feelings I never expressed, because I knew my boss read my blog.

Well, I went back to the old nonprofit job thinking I hadn't had it so bad after all. My paycheck wasn't a hefty one, but I was doing something good there. Believing if I just did my job to the best of my ability, I could put up with my boss not respecting me. I also thought I could handle snide remarks and nasty jokes at my expense, and rude comments about others...

I realize now that I have spent about three of the past five years just waiting. I've been waiting for something to change for me. Finally, I realized that I had to be that change. I've learned that we can't expect the constants around us to vary. We have to be the variables.

So...I quit my job last week. Live and learn, right? I'm taking a little time off, before I start looking for something else, and am not-so-secretly hoping that my artwork will make me a rich woman.

In the meantime...

Nothing but blue skies from now on. ^_^

Really In a Stew!

I googled ANGRY BIRD & found this image here.

Disclaimer: I am ranting in this post. I love many a person with free-time, stay at home wives, and/or mothers. I know we all have different priorities. I'm currently frustrated, so please refrain from taking offense to anything I type. Thank you.

If any of you pulchritudinous* people out there have read this old blog before, chances are high that you're aware of my tendency to overbook myself. To say I have a lot going on would be an understatement. I'm an artist, a secretary, and a program director. I'm slightly obsessive compulsive, and I have a problem saying "No."

All that being said, I'm not alone in my way too busy for a day-jobness. I had the following conversation recently.

BFF: I'm so tired of database work! I want to be at home sewing!!!
Me: Yeah. I keep thinking about things for etsy, the cake topper/guest book I'm working on, the book I'm illustrating. There's just so much to do that work gets in the way of, and it's insane! I even find myself being a little catty towards people who stay home. I know mom's that have kids in school have plenty to do, but I start wondering how they can have NO ARTSY CRAFTY ANYTHING! No hobbies!
BFF: Me too. It irritates me that other people have all this time on their hands, and I have none. When I do nothing - I feel guilty.
Me: I know.
Me: Why can't all the world be like us? It'd be a much better place...There would be biscotti and puppies...Starbucks and photography...
BFF: Warm woolen mittens, and brown paper packages tied up with string?
Me: Yes! Yes!! YES!!!

Now, this may seem a little off subject, but it's not. We have so much to do, and no time to do it! We're also ever so mildly insane, as you can see from the above conversation. If I were you, and I had free time, I'd come up with a hobby real quick-like. There are more of us, and we're likely to lash out eventually.

*That means you're beeeyooootiful. I used the thesaurus to find a new word for lovely to behold, and I thought that pulchritudinous was pretty interesting. Kind of an ugly word to have such a nice meaning, don't you think?

Gloom & Doom

I've never really done this before, but I'm giving my husband the silent treatment. Mind you, this will not be easy. I don't play off silent very well at all. I am always the first to send up the white flag, whether I was at fault or not. I just hate arguing. But that will not happen this day.

I had an extremely rough morning, and he was unsympathetic and just plain mean to me. Even when I told him that I left my lunch, yummy egg rolls, on top of my Jeep as I left for work this morning.

It was raining on me. I had my hands full. The egg rolls were frozen and causing my fingers to go numb. So, I sat them on my roof. Innocent enough, but oh the repercussions.

So, they bounced off into a mud puddle. Face down. Thus adding to my horrible morning. All because of the rain!

When I called my husband for pity. That is what I wanted. Just an "Oh no, baby." Instead I got a lecture on how me being me just annoys him. The gist was that I am an ineffective moron. When I asked him to please stop, and I said it loudly, he hung up on me.

Now, in his measly defense, he had a rough morning too. I understand snapping, but I do not condone HANGING UP ON ME FOR NO REASON and then not apologizing.

I'm not one for games. I hate them and I do NOT play them. Manipulating someones actions and emotions creeps me out. It's like an evil science project, but today I am not speaking to him until he admits that hanging up on me was not justified, and apologizes for being a big mean man.

Furthermore, I blame all of this on the weather. The rain is killing us. The clouds are blocking out the sky and sun, and we will all die soon.